Day 87 : Experiencing Reject at last Moment

 Today when I was eating our diner. My wife received a message from our potentiel client telling her that she was canceled his decision to commit in the program. At this moment I felt discomfort inside me and remember the numbers of time I received the same message again and again especially last week when a potentiel prospect hesitate at last time 


And I begin to think that there is a main point inside me that not help me to go beyond that point.


I failed ashamed , worthless and also not sure about the product and also feel that needed of other.  That make me focus on this main emotion that I experience all the time about I am.not enough..I need others...I can not close the cycle..I enjoy the win in my mind all the time before make it real in physical world. 

I feel doubt if there is someone who can pay this amount of money 

People hesitate at last time and giving up..


Where In my life I did same thing ,!?

When I told some one to pay and go but last time I give up without any reaction 


When I commit for some thing with my kids or my client and I hesitate and give up in the last time


When I make decision to do some thing or schedule some thing and I hesitate and change my mind at the last time.


When I promise myself to spend some money for my own or for my wife or for my kids gift and I change my mind in the last time by Fearing to spend or luck and mainly not assuming responsibilities 


The main subject when I do the same pattern is when I want or made decision to spend some money and I find myself to postpone or procrastinate because I have fear to lose or spend money and live the lack of money. 


The main pattern also is when I promise or declare that I will do some thing and still have doubt and I hesitate and change my mind at the last time and I do not keep my mind and my word.





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